Two main ways to support yourself/others are:
- Listening -> Intaking one’s energy; stooping to their level and connecting emotionally. When you connect AND show an accepting attitude (“It’s okay that you feel this way; I understand”), this helps the person to also accept and thus process the state/feelings.
- Remedying -> Outputting your energy; inspiring someone to get them to rise to a higher level. Showing them a different path – an energetic solution to reframing things and feeling lighter. More here.
There’s the stereotype that when a woman talks about her problem, a man will jump in with solutions, making the woman feel unheard. There’s also the opposite stereotype of a man feeling bothered by something and keeping to himself trying to fix it, while his woman insists on getting him to talk about his feelings to her. In both stereotypes the parties are misunderstanding each other’s needs. In general, men prefer fixing their and others’ problems, while women want to connect and be connected with.
In truth, you most likely need both ways of support. Develop an intuition for what type of support you need in the moment. Learn to give yourself each one in accordance with your needs – either by yourself or by contacting someone who will help you with it (a parent, friend, psychologist, etc.). Also, when helping another person, be sensitive to what type of support they need instead of just stupidly pushing your way. It’s a matter of sensitivity and balance, no matter if the support is for another or yourself.